My blood is literally on fire right now. I cannot believe this.

"yeah, we’re walking right into their homes and shooting them"

jesus fucking christ.

I am speechless.

(via shelovestheblacks)

Ignoring your passion is slow suicide. Never ignore what your heart pumps for. Mold your career around your lifestyle not your lifestyle around your career.

Don’t think too high of anyone. A person is a person. No matter how perfect they may appear, none are flawless on this earth. Don’t think someone can understand you more than you understand yourself. Don’t seek completeness through a soulmate or a friend. No one can possibly bring you happiness. When we expect someone to fill us with joy, we tend to get disappointed as they fill us with sadness. Sometimes our imagination plays tricks on us by creating the perfect picture of that particular person; when in reality that person may not care about you at all. A best friend might not realize that you’re getting uncomfortable in the friendship; or that you don’t like what they’re doing. A boyfriend/girlfriend may not be your soulmate yet you still put effort into the relationship. Life can get so confusing and complicated so we seek comfort through other human beings. The biggest mistake is to do so.

And you tried to change, didn’t you? Closed your mouth more. Tried to be softer, prettier, less volatile, less awake… You can’t make homes out of human beings. Someone should have already told you that. And if he wants to leave, then let him leave. You are terrifying, and strange, and beautiful. Something not everyone knows how to love.

إذا عرفت نفسك فلا يضرك ما قيل فيك
“If you know yourself, then you’ll not be harmed by what is said about you.”

On “staying true to yourself”

Let me make this clear because I feel like I will never repeat it enough. 
It’s useless to say “stay true to yourself”. 
You’ll always be true to yourself. You are yourself. 

But you should stay true to your cause. 
If you have something dear or sacred, you should cherish and nourish it with your every action. 

If you change your mind, if your plans change purpose, then staying true to yourself may require you to change your habits and your views to pursue your new objective. 

And that’s normal. 
That’s what needs to happen in order for you to grow up and evolve as a person, whatever your interests are or will be, however often you’ll change your mind. 

Take a chance to see how new things you’ve never been brave enough to try might affect your current situation, and if you’re not satisfied with the result, just try again and again or go back.
It won’t be a waste of time because you might just notice that, even if switching entirely your environment is impossible without major variations, there are some things you could do better or not do at all to at least improve your mood.

Staying “always the same” and as people remember you might not always be the best option. It might never be, actually.
The lack of any progress whatsoever, personality-wise, is impossible if you’re affected by outside events even in the least. 

So why not choosing on your own how to change for your cause? 

On old age

I’m currently trying to take care of my grandfather who’s 90 and recently lost his spouse.

He doesn’t remember her, except when reminded.

He doesn’t remember me. Day after day I try to explain once again that I’m the daughter of his daughter and that I’m here because it’s our house. 

The first two days had me drained to the bone.
I’d never done something like this. I’d never been in this situation so it took me some time to get accustomed to it. 
I believe it’s not something that will ever come easy to me.

The issue here is not patience. I have plenty and I’ve always loved my grandfather.
Until I was 6, I actually lived with my grandparents, seen that my parents both worked full time.
The issue, then, is exactly this. He is the one I looked up to when I was little. He’s one of the people who raised me to be who I am and now the tables have turned. 
I have to take care of him and try to reason with him in order to make him eat and drink and have even the smallest conversation about something.

It’s hard for me, emotionally, to engage in such an interaction. Yet, for his sake and to help my parents while they can’t be home, I will.

I gladly will.

But I don’t wanna get like this.
I’ll never want to be a burden to the ones I love.
I see no purpose in growing as old as modern medicine allows us.
The body is decaying anyway, why should you keep me alive, healing me again and again, or numbing me to try to keep the pain of an incurable illness away? 
What’s the point? Allowing me to live an empty sequence of years I won’t remember the day after is no favour.
It’s not a decent life. It’s a prolonged death in a conscious limbo of nothing.

It’s selfish clinging to people like that. It’s morbid and I’m determined I won’t allow it when it’s going to be my time.

I’m repurposing this blog.

It will be used to write arguments I can’t explain in their whole length on twitter.

Be safe.